On the morning I was born, snow covered the town
Tiny small hands reached for the blue sky
Like a girl next door we'd always known
With one ear, I hear the graduation song
Even alone, I am OK, turning the pages of my own story
I want to blame someone It hurts, no I hate it.
In sadness I cried, and the bud disappeared
Autumn comes, then winter, and I am another year older
You can run far away, but your story never ends.
Grinning from ear to ear, I'm such a coward. I can't stand it.
You may step over me, but I will follow and cling to you
I try to fill the hole in my heart Without a doubt, I can't stand it.
I'm such a coward. I can't stand it. It hurts. No, I hate it.
Kaoru disappeared on the day snow fell on the grey city
for the first time this year.
Even though I should've realized somewhere that this would happen,
no matter what, no matter what, I couldn't change the course.
Let's go to some warm country for a while.
Let's eat some good food, gaze at the ocean and relax.
Heck no.
I can tell.
You've… got the look of,
"Ahh, at last the weight's off my shoulders. "
Right?
After all, you reluctantly came along.
Going so far as to violate what Dad told you…
Dad said it. didn't he?
He said, "Move towards the light. "
You saw it, didn't you?
But, I couldn't see anything like light.
And I couldn't see where it was shining from…
It's impossible. There's nothing I can do
even if a guy like you who "has" tells me.
I don't have anything.
It was always just about you for Dad as well until the end…
If I were like you, how…
Shiroyama, was I mistaken?
Cruel revenge for someone with a capacity for imagination
is impossible to begin with.
Moreover, Master Kaoru is oddly kindhearted.
He himself receives the damage he inflicts on another.
If something were to happen to Kaoru, I…
It'll be okay. Didn't I tell you?
Master Kaoru has a rich imagination.
And on top of that, he's smart and has a good memory.
I told you, didn't I?
- You've no idea what - When we all ate fermented soybeans
- a litany of it he has. - before at Shiroyama's parents' place.
Matsuda's long suffering until now in Chicago
and the accumulated efforts of all we subordinates
who watched the same things for close to twenty years.
And most of all, you who adored him all the while
and never left his side…
All that is probably flitting around like crazy inside his head right about now,
unable to throw himself away…
I'm sorry. Could you leave her alone for a while?
Does she not feel well…?
I mean…
Hagu?
Hagu, does it hurt? You want some painkillers?
No, thanks… I'm fine like this. I wouldn't be able to tell…
If I'm unable to feel pain in this hand as is.
it means the nerves aren't connected, right?
If so, shouldn't I have another surgery as soon as possible?
Then. now…
Hagu…
Shu. Shu…
Shu…
What's the matter, Hagu?
It's come.
The pain has come…
My hand… It's okay. They're connected. My hand.
Thank good… ness…
Hagu?!
- Hagu! - Hagu!
Then, she hadn't gotten a wink of sleep
the whole time since then?
Yeah. I told Hagu everything about the situation.
And the doctor made sure to explain everything to her.
If the worst were to happen and the nerves weren't connected.
it would be a battle against time in terms of the nerve threads.
If they were going to operate again,
it should be done as soon as possible.
So Hagu was desperately chasing after it.
The sensation of her right hand…
Among the pain from all the other injuries…
She refused pain medication and tranquilizers.
And without sleeping at all…
she just stared into the darkness…
Hagu's…amazing…
I'll be honest.
Ayumi and I were overwhelmed.
Overwhelmed by the strength inside her.
By the strong will that could even bring
pain into submission…
From here on is the true turning point.
Everything will be riding on the rehab after this…
Hagu is who she is.
Until there's movement.
she probably won't give up on anything.
It seems there are cases when feeling up to the fingertips
doesn't return even after continuing rehab.
We don't know if she'll be able
to hold a brush and paint like she used to…
She might have to deal with numbness
and sensory impairment like this forever…
Nothing may come of it just with effort.
However, she'll surely lose it if she doesn't make an effort…
Oh. God.
Please help her…
What? You finally decided to get a cell phone?
Mr. Nomiya…
I see. So that's why you were looking at cell phones, huh?
I was thinking if there was something I could do to help…
I thought I should have one if there was…
But the truth is. I don't know.
Is there really something I can do for her?
It sounds corny, but I thought our worlds really are different…
Yeah. You're right.
Everyone probably thinks that.
And so we don't get too close to her.
We do that thinking,
"It doesn't seem like there's anything I can do for her"
And so, she is completely alone…
Her main concern right now is probably whether she can move her hand or not.
But her real struggle begins once her physical therapy starts.
Ayumi, stay. You have to stay…
You're her friend, right?
Right.
Thanks, Mr. Nomiya…
Man. what a troublesome kid…
- Uh, oh. Oh, no. They heard. - Oh…
- A man past thirty saying - Well…
with all his might
- something like the bittersweet line, - I mean…
"You're her friend, right?" - That earlier was…
will be used as rich material
and I'll be totally laughed at for the rest of my life.
What'll I do? Something like that!
Nomiya…
Good job.
What?
A friend. huh? How weak.
For some reason, just those words make me cry.
I know. When you get to this age, all kinds of things become difficult.
And everyone ends up growing apart…
It's not like that! You've got me, Yamazaki!
M-Miwako!
We're friends for life.
We're friends…
We'll prove that there is friendship that can't be broken
even after you've grown up.
- Ruuu-ru-ru#ru-ru-ruuu# friends#friends# - Uh. Boss… Please leave it at that…
I felt it the whole time…
I felt like she was looking someplace other than here
even when she'd be… right in front of me.
She's here now…
But I get the feeling that one day she'll just take off and be gone.
But…
You're her friend, right?
Hagu.
Ayu…
What do you think? It got kind of bulgy, but…
It's warm…
I thought it'd keep your back and shoulders warm
for when you get up a little.
It's down, so it's light, isn't it?
I'll also make you an arm fixation pillow.
It'd be better if it were a little cuter, right?
Oh, I also brought some grapes.
The Red Globe ones you like that you can eat with the skin…
Let's see, and I brought some books and some MDs and…
Ayu, you've got a feather in your hair.
And on your clothes, too…
Ohhh. I made sure to get them off before I left the house…
I actually made that cloak
using some of my dad's old down feathers.
There were feathers all over the room.
It was something else.
When I cut like this with the scissors.
feathers went flying with great force…
It was really something.
It took two whole hours to clean up…
Ayu, you've got a bunch on your back, too.
What? No way! Ohhh! Take them off for me. What? Why?
You don't need to take them off…
Hagu?
Because…
Because, you look like an angel.
Thanks…
Thanks, Ayu…
I'll come back tomorrow at two.
Thank you, Dr. Satsuki.
It seems it was quite a shock…
Yes…
Mr. Hanamoto. Mr. Hanamoto…
Oh…
Are you listening, Mr. Hanamoto?
Oh, yes…
Hagumi's entire upper body has become stiff.
Please massage the area around the shoulder and upper arm
avoiding the affected area like we did together yesterday.
Just rubbing gently would be fine.
The goal is to get her to relax.
Be positive, but take things easy.
Right…
Thank you very much.
H-How expensive…
Flowers sure are expensive. Just this one is 300 yen?
I can only get three even with 1,000 yen.
How much would a bouquet cost?
Yuta.
Oh, uhh, Ayumi…
For Hagu?
Oh, uh, I thought flowers or something would be nice…
But…
Yuta.
Shall we go somewhere good?
Ayumi, could it be that somewhere good is…
That's right. This is the place.
There are flowers here! This many.
All the flowers you can pick…
Give them to her and say, "I picked these. "
I'm sure Hagu would be happier with that.
All right.
Here, Hagu.
I'm so happy…
They're fresh-picked.
We picked them on a slope by the train tracks.
Actually, the orange stonecrops were the biggest and prettiest,
but we thought they'd be too powdery.
Hagu…?
No way…
The feeling in her fingertips…
There isn't any… Can that be…?
Her rehab has only just started.
Also, it seems there are many people who took time
and recovered feeling from the same condition as Hagu's.
But…
Ayumi, don't panic. Don't give up. That goes for us, too.
If the people by her side get shaken,
the person drowning will no longer have anyone to grab onto, right?
And so, all of you make sure to solidify your footing…
Ayumi, don't you look after the shop on Wednesdays?!
And Yuta, you've got your graduation work!
Give it all you've got!
You guys have been coming like every day, right?
I'm grateful, but you must not neglect yourself.
Sensei…
What?
Was the person who was here last night Hagu's father?
That's right…
I figured it out from the sight I saw last night
and Sensei's expression earlier.
I see…
The fact that the place where she was supposed
to be able to return to has changed…
I know. Nobody's in the wrong.
Everyone's just living the best they can respectively…
But God, why so much all at once?
She won't…
… be able to stand it like this…
She…
Bruises like red flowers started to spread on Hagu's left arm.
She bites on it due to stress.
But after a while, the bruises spread to Sensei's arm…
The person drowning will no longer have anyone to grab onto, right?
Sensei was frighteningly calm. For Hagu's sake,
he was probably determined never to get shaken.
I received a fax yesterday from Shin.
It said he wants me
to meet up with the others in mid-April at the new site in Morioka…
The day of farewell is really approaching…
Will we move apart like this?
Will I leave her like that in the shape she's in?
Maybe I should forget about Morioka and stay in Tokyo…
Yeah, right. What am I thinking?
What's the point of giving up on employment?
What's the purpose of life? Is it not
to hold a special person's hands tight at a time like this?
That's right. I'll quit and be at her side all the while…
I'll cheer her up and help out with her rehab…
If I help out with her care, I should choose a part-time job
where I can have whatever shifts I want.
Cleaning offices, or road construction.
or a late-night convenience store.
But hold it.
Can I get along okay by myself in Tokyo
on only that kind of income?
Right now I'm living on part-time jobs and assistance from home.
It's a matter of course, but after I graduate,
I'll somehow have to scrape up the money for everything myself.
No, it'll be okay if I work part-time jobs as much as I can.
I can live if I just don't splurge.
But, if I take on as many part-time jobs as I can,
then I'll become unable to care for Hagu.
More importantly, what do I do after she gets better…?
After being sent to art school at great expense…
I won't have a job,
won't have marketable skills and will be over thirty years old…
If such things were to happen,
will my own existence not change into her burden?
Takumi's words came to mind.
If something were to happen to the girl I love,
I would want to have enough to be able to say,
"Don't worry about anything. Just rest for a while. "
Now I understand the meaning of those words.
There's no way a man who can't even buy one measly flower
can save the one girl he loves…
All I'm doing is sidestepping the issue.
I say I want to help her.
and just don't want to drift away from her…
Everything would be so much easier
If all these emotions would disappear
Without a word.
We each take our separate roads
And our paths part
We'll never meet again
Meeting is just too sad.
We gather the emotions we miss.
But emotions cool as quickly as they warm
We believe it can't be true
How long will we hold onto these words
How long?
Next time: "When I was younger, I saw God"